retail therapy

I have been thinking a lot about retail therapy today--mostly because after feeling absolutely crushed, I saw a movie and then purchased a fabulous pair of shoes.

As I examined my pedicure (also scheduled earlier to cope with the trauma) looking lovely through the peep-toe of this work of art, I could not help but wonder why buying something offered me a feeble moment of joy. At first, I felt the gross guilt of apathetic, wasteful consumerism. I felt the superficiality of enjoying meaningless things that I do not need.

But on a second thought, I decided that I rarely treat myself--and usually resort to treating myself only when something has gone awry. I try very hard to be fiscally responsible and have a savings--so I understand why I would use a time when I am feeling low as an excuse to splurge. So long as I am in touch with my feelings, using these escapades simply as a momentary escape and not an alternative reality, I have decided it is a nice way to clear my mind for a few moments, and enjoy a great pair of flats. I do not think that a pair of shoes can solve any of my problems in life--otherwise I would be joyous right now instead of extremely hurt--but it's nice to have a small change.